Are you tired of just ranting about your company rules?

My friend Nica Dumlao informed me that the Employees’ League in ICT-enabled Services (E-Lites) is sponsoring a Seminar-Workshop for workers in the Business Process Outsourcing industry this Saturday and Sunday (September 19 & 20) at Gems Hotel in Antipolo City.

She also said that the aforementioned event will be about the Philippine Labor Code, International Labor Standards, and Occupational Safety & Health. The event is entirely free of charge.

E-Lites is the group behind the free concert event for BPO employees at the Penguin Bar in Malate last year.

UPDATE: For those interested in reserving a slot, simply proceed to Chowking Cubao (beside Eurotel) 10am on Saturday and text/call me at 09167706376 or email me (nearestcomfortroom@yahoo.com).

Go not placidly amidst the noise and haste as you may be marked down for dead air. Avoid quiet and passive persons as they may worsen your insomnia. Walk a mile. Your life does not revolve around your workstation. Speak glowingly of the better customers; and heed well their advice, as you will learn to love them as the irate ones call.

Know what to do – and when, and, also, be wary of that annoying echo that sometimes gives some clue whenever you are being monitored. Consider that two wrongs never make a right, but that three may do if only for the joy of being petiks. Whenever possible, put people on hold. Be comforted, that in the face of all irritation and disillusionment, and despite the changing fortunes of time, there are always some incentives due to power hours and good metrics.

Remember the times that your biological clock is still normal. Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle, and mutilate. Whatever makes you fit. Know thyself. If you need help, avail of a supervisor. Exercise caution in your daily affairs, especially with those closest to you… That Avaya on your left, for instance. Be assured that floorwalking through the seas of most souls would scarcely get your feet wet. Fall not in love, therefore, as the promiscuous culture of the industry may make you jaded. Gracefully surrender the things of day life: the birds, clean air, the sun, Philippine Daily Inquirer- and let not the sands of time get in your lunch. Hire people of blind obedience. For a good time, call 09167706376, ask for Primo. Take heart in the deepening gloom that the pantry is finally serving sensible food. And reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could only be worse in Sprint.

Therefore, make peace with your god, whatever you perceive him to be: your arrogant account manager or a machine meant to withdraw money from. With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal, the industry , cross your fingers, is here to stay. Apir!

*My apologies to Max Ehrmann and the National Lampoon